How to Stop Worrying and Start Living

QHB's 10 Points of Focus and Summaries

How to Stop Worrying & Start Living 10 Points:

1. Live in Day-tight Compartments: Focus on the present and avoid worrying about the future. Embrace each day fully to reduce anxiety and stress.

2. Apply Willis H. Carrier's Magic Formula: When faced with worry, ask yourself what the worst possible outcome is, prepare to accept it, and then work to improve on that worst-case scenario.

3. Understand the Impact of Worry on Health: Recognize that worry can have severe consequences on your physical and mental health, and take steps to mitigate it through constructive actions.

4. Analyze and Solve Worry Problems Systematically: Gather all the facts, weigh them carefully, make a decision, and act on it. Writing down the problem and potential solutions can help clarify your thinking.

5. Stay Busy to Crowd Out Worry: Engage in activities that require concentration and effort to keep your mind occupied and away from worry.

6. Don't Fuss About Trifles and Use the Law of Averages: Avoid letting minor issues bother you and use statistical reasoning to put your worries into perspective.

7. Cooperate with the Inevitable and Practice Acceptance: Accept what cannot be changed and focus on what you can control, reducing unnecessary stress and worry.

8. Cultivate a Positive Mental Attitude: Develop habits that promote peace and happiness, such as counting your blessings, avoiding comparisons, and finding joy in giving to others.

9. Rest and Relax to Prevent Fatigue and Worry: Take regular breaks, relax at work and home, and maintain good working habits to prevent fatigue, which can exacerbate worry.

10. Find Meaningful and Enjoyable Work: Seek out work that you are passionate about and that aligns with your skills and interests to achieve happiness and success.

QHB's Selected Book Quotes and Summaries

*** DC = Dale Carnegie (The Author)

=== Preface ===

# “Science is a collection of successful recipes.” - French Philosopher Valery

# “Our trouble is not ignorance, but inaction.” - DC

=== PART ONE: FUNDAMENTAL FACTS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT WORRY ===

“ Part One in a Nutshell: Rule 1: … Live in “Day-tight compartments”. Don't stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime. Rule 2: … try the magic formula of Willis H. Carrier … Rule 3: … Remind yourself of the exorbitant price you can pay for worry in terms of your health.. .” - DC

=== Chapter 1: Live in ‘Day-tight Compartments’ ===

# “Our main business is not to see what lies dimly at a distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand.” - Thomas Carlyle

# “Shut off the future as tightly as the past … the future is today … There is no tomorrow. The day of man’s salvation is now. Waste of energy, mental distress, nervous worries dog the steps of a man who is anxious about the future… “ - Sir William Osier

# “But he did go on in that address to say that the best possible way to prepare for tomorrow is to concentrate with all of your intelligence, all your enthusiasm, on doing today’s work superbly today. That is the only possible way you can prepare for the future.” - DC

# “By all means take thought for tomorrow, yes, careful thought and planning and preparation. But have no anxiety.” - DC

# “One grain of sand at a time. One task at a time.” - Ted Bengermino

# “Everyday is a new life to a wise man.” - Horace

# “Carpe diem. “Enjoy the day”. Or, “Seize the day.” Yes, seize the day, and make the most of it.” - DC

# “So the first thing you should know about worry is this: if you want to keep it out of your life, do what Sir William Osier did - shut the iron doors on the past and the future. Live in Day-tight Compartments.” - DC

=== Chapter 2: A Magic Formula for Solving Worry Situations ===

# “True peace of mind comes from accepting the worst. Psychologically, I think, it means a release of energy.” - Lin Yutang

# “So, Rule 2 is: If you have a worry problem, apply the magic formula of Willis H. Cartier by doing three things: Ask yourself, “What is the worst that can possibly happen?” Prepare to accept it if you have to. Then calmly proceed to improve on the worst.” - DC

=== Chapter 3: What Worry may Do to You ===

# “Business-men who do not know how to fight worry die young.” - Dr. Alexis Carrel.

# “the greatest mistake physicians make is that they attempt to cure the body without attempting to cure the mind; yet the mind and body are one and should be treater separately! “ - Plato

# “Yes, the worst has overtaken you. O.K. - Face the facts! Quit Worrying! And then do something about it!” - Dr. McCraffery

# “I am not so foolish as to imagine that merely smiling cam cure cancer. But I do believe that a cheerful mental attitude helps the body fight disease.” - Olga K. Jarvey

=== PART TWO: BASIC TECHNIQUES IN ANALYSING WORRY ===

“ Part Two in a Nutshell: Rule 1: Get the facts. … Rule 2: After carefully weighing all the facts, come to a decision. Rule 3: Once a decision is carefully reached, Act! … Rule 4: When you … are tempted to worry about a problem, write out and answer the following questions: what is the problem? What is the cause of the problem? What are all possible solutions? What is the best solutions?” - DC

=== Chapter 4: How to Analyze and Solve Worry Problems ===

“ I keep six honest serving-men (they taught me all I knew): Their names are What and Why and When and How and Where and Who.” - Rudyard Kipling

# “Confusion is the chief cause of worry.” - Herbert E. Hawkins

# “half the worry in the world is caused by people trying to make decisions before they have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision.” - Dean Hawkes of Columbia University

# “The Rule for solving our problems is: Get the facts. Let’s do what Dean Hawkes did: let’s. To even attempt to solve our problems without first collecting all the facts in an impartial manner. However, getting all the facts in the world wont do us any good until we analyze them and interpret them.” - DC

# “A problem well stated is a problem half solved.” - DC

# “So I banish about ninety per cent of worries by taking these four steps: Writing down precisely what I am worrying about. Writing down what I can do about it. Deciding what to do. Starting immediately to carry out that decision.” - Galen Litchfield

=== Chapter 5: How to Eliminate Fifty Per Cent of your Business Worries ===

# “Much less time is now consumed in the house of Simon and Schuster in worrying and talking about what is wrong; and a lot more action is obtained toward making those things right.” - Leon Shimkin

# “Can you apply these questions to your business problems? To repeat my challenge - they can reduce your worries by fifty per cent. Here they are again: What is the problem? What is the cause of the problem? What are all possible solutions to the problem? What solution do you suggest? “ - DC

=== PART THREE: HOW TO BREAK THE WORRY HABIT BEFORE IT BREAKS YOU ===

“ Part Three in a Nutshell: Rule 1: Crowd worry out of your mind by keeping busy. … Rule 2: Don't fuss about trifles … Rule 3: Use the law of averages to put law your worries. … Rule 4: Co-operate with the inevitable. Rule 5: Put a “stop-loss” order on your worries. Rule 6: Let the past bury its dead.” - DC

=== Chapter 6: How to Crowd Worry out of your Mind ===

# “ I realized that it is difficult to worry while you are busy doing something that requires planning and thinking. In my case, building the boat has knocked worry out of the ring. So I resolved to keep busy.” - Marion J. Douglas

# “I'm too busy. I have no time to worry.” - Winston Churchill

# “One of the most fundamental laws ever revealed by Psychology. And that law is: that it is utterly impossible for any human mind , no matter how brilliant, to think of more than one thing at any given time. You don’t quite believe it? Very well, let’s try an experiment. Supposed you lean back right now, close your eyes, and try, at the same instant, to think of the statue of Liberty and of what you plan to do tomorrow morning. (Go ahead, try it.)” - DC

# “I must lose myself in action, lest I wither in despair.” - Tennyson

# “Get busy. Keep busy. Its the cheapest kind of medicine there is on this earth - and one of the best.” - DC

=== Chapter 7: Don’t let the Beetles Get you Down ===

# “A well known legal maxim says: De minimis nom curat lex - “the law does not concern itself with trifles.” And neither should the worrier - if he wanted peace of mind.” - DC

# “Life is too short to be little.” - Andre Maurois

# “The mosquitoes were enough to drive a saint insane. But they couldn't triumph over Charles Seifred. While waiting for us, he cut a limb off an aspen tree - and made a whistle of it. When we arrived, was he cussing the mosquitoes? No, he was playing his whistle. I have kept that whistle as a memento of a man who knew how to put trifles in their place.” - DC

=== Chapter 8: A Law that will Outlaw many of your Worries ===

# “ ‘By the law of averages, it wont happen.’ That phrase has destroyed ninety per cent of my worries; and it has made the past twenty years of my life beautiful and peaceful beyond my highest expectations.” - DC

# “Nearly all the worries and unhappiness came from their imagination, and not from reality.” - General George Crook

# “The next time you and I are worrying about what may happen, lets take a tip from wise old Al Smith: Let’s examine the record and see what basis there is, if any, for our gnawing anxieties.” - DC

=== Chapter 9: Co-Operate with the Inevitable ===

# “Be willing to have it so, Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequence of any misfortune.” - William James

# “Carry on, no matter what happens. Hide your private sorrows under a smile and carry on.” - Elizabeth Connley

# “It is not miserable to be blind, it is only miserable not to be able to endure blindness.” - John Milton

# “I wouldn't worry if I lost every cent I have because I don’t see what is to be gained by worrying. I do the best job I possibly can; and leave the results in the laps of the gods.” - J. C. Penney

# “When I can’t handle events, I let them handle themselves.” - Henry Ford

# “There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.” - Epictetus

# “If it has to be, it has to be.” - Sarah Bernhardt

=== Chapter 10: Put a ‘Stop-Loss’ Order on your Worries ===

# “To put it another way: We are fools when we overpay for a thing in terms of what it takes out of our very existence.” - DC

# “Do we give a hoot in Hades about which is to be blame? No, we are too concerned with our own problems to waste a minute thinking about Tolstoy’s.” - DC

=== Chapter 11: Don’t Try to Saw Sawdust ===

# “There is only one way on God’s green footstool that the past can be constructive; and that is by calmly analyzing our past mistakes and profiting by them - and forgetting them.” - DC

# “How many of you have ever sawed sawdust? of course, you can’t saw sawdust! Its already sawed! And its the same with the past. When you start worrying about things that are over and done with, you’re merely trying to saw sawdust.” - Mr Shedd

# “So why waste the tears? Of course, we have been guilty of blunders and absurdities! And so what? Who hasn’t?” - DC

=== PART FOUR: SEVEN WAYS TO CULTIBATE A MENTAL ATTITUDE THAT WILL BRING YOU PEACE AND HAPPINESS ===

# “Seven ways to cultivate a Mental attitude that will bring you Pease and Happiness: Rule 1: … “our life is what our thoughts make it”. Rule 2: … Let’s never waste a minute thinking about people we don’t like. Rule 3: … Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let’s expect it … to give for the joy of giving. … if we want our children to be grateful, we must train them to be grateful.” Rule 4: Count your blessings-not your troubles! Rule 5: Let’s not imitate others. … Rule 6: When fate hands us a lemon, let’s try to make a lemonade. Rule 7: … “When you are good to others, you are best to yourself.” - DC

=== Chapter 12: Eight Words that can Transform your Life ===

# “Our life is what our thoughts make it.” - Marcus Aurelius

# “You are not what you think you are; but what you think, you are.” - Norman Vincent Peale

# “Concern means realizing what the problems are and calmly taking steps to meet them. Worrying means going around in maddening, futile circles.” - DC

# “The mind is its own place, and in itself Can make a heaven of Hell, a hell of Heaven.” - John Milton

# “Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.” - Epictetus

# “In other words, William James tells us that we cannot instantly change our emotions just by “making up our minds to” - but that we can change our actions. And that when we change our actions, we will automatically change our feelings.” - DC

# “most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” - Abraham Lincoln

=== Chapter 13: The High Cost of getting Even ===

# “When we hate our enemies, we are giving them power over us: power over our sleep, our appetites, our blood pressure, our health and our happiness. Our enemies would dance with joy if only they knew how they were worrying us, lacerating us and getting even with us! Our hate is not hurting them, but our hate is turning our own days and nights into a hellish turmoil.” - DC

# “Even if we cant love our enemies, let’s at least love ourselves. Let’s love ourselves so much that we won’t permit our enemies to control our happiness, our health and our looks.” - DC

# “Let’s do as General Eisenhower does: let’s never waste a minute thinking about people we don’t like.” - DC

=== Chapter 14: If you do This, You will never worry about Ingratitude ===

# “Gratitude is a fruit of great cultivation. You do not find it among gross people.” - Dr. Samuel Johnson

# “It is natural for people to forget to be grateful; so, if we go around expecting gratitude, we are headed straight for a lot of heartaches.” - DC

# “Let’s remember that the only way to find happiness is not to expect gratitude, but to give for the joy of giving.” - DC

=== Chapter 15: Would you take a Million Dollars for what you Have? ===

# “I had the blues because I had no shoes, Until upon the street, I met a man who had no feet.” - Harold Abbott

# “Why don’t you stop right now and ask yourself: “What in the hell am I worrying about?” You will probably find that it is comparatively unimportant and insignificant.” - DC

# “As Schopenhauer said: “We seldom think of what we have but always of what we lack. Yes, the tendency to “seldom think of what we have but always of what we lack” is the greatest tragedy on earth.” - DC

# “The habit of looking on the best side of every event is worth more than thousand pounds a year.” - Dr. Samuel Johnson

# “There are two things to aim in life: first, to get what you want; and after that, to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second.” - Logan Pearsall Smith

=== Chapter 16: Find Yourself and Be Yourself: remember there is No one else on earth like you ===

# “I cant write a book commensurate with Shakespeare, but I can write a book by me.” - Sir Walter Raleigh

# “If you cant be a highway, then just be a trail, if you can’t be the sun, be a star; it isn’t by size that you win or fail - Be the best of whatever you are!” - Douglas Malloch

=== Chapter 17: If you have a Lemon, make a Lemonade ===

# “ ‘when you have a lemon, make lemonade.’ This is what great educator does. But the fool does the exact opposite.” - DC

# “Two men looked out from prison bars, One saw the mud, the other saw stars.” - Thelma Thompson

# “Happiness is not mostly pleasure; it is mostly victory.” - Harry Emerson Fosdick

# “I have been convinced that a surprisingly large number of them succeeded because they started out with handicaps that spurred them on to great endeavor and great rewards.” - DC

# “The most important thing in life is not to capitalize your gains. Any fool can do that. The really important thing is to profit from your losses. That requires intelligence; and it makes the difference between a man of sense and a fool.” - DC

=== Chapter 18: How to cure Melancholy in Fourteen Days ===

# “I have been busy and happy trying to help other people, I have few worries”’ - C. R. Burton

# “You can be cured in fourteen days if you follow this prescription. Try to think every day how you can please someone.” - Alfred Adler

# “A good deed is one that brings a smile of joy to the face of another.” - Prophet Mohammed

# “I found that happiness is contagious. By giving, we receive. By helping someone and giving out love, I had conquered worry and sorrow and self pity, and felt like a new person.” - DC

# “Doing good to others is not a duty. It is a joy, for it increases your own health and happiness.” - Zoroaster

# “When you are good to others, you are best to yourself.” - Benjamin Franklin

=== PART FIVE: THE GOLDEN RULE FOR CONQUERING WORRY ===

# “How to keep from Worrying about Criticism: Rule 1 is unjust criticism is often disguised compliment… Rule 2 is Do the very best you can … Rule 3 is … Let’s ask for unbiased, helpful, constructive criticism. “ - DC

=== Chapter 19: How my Mother and Father Conquered Worry ===

# “Of course, the sovereign cure for worry is religious faith.” - William James

# “Man is not made to understand life, but to live it.” - Santayana

# “The blackest moments we live through can only last a little time - and then comes the future …” - Mary Cushman

# “We and God have business with each other; and in opening ourselves to His influence, our deepest destiny is fulfilled.” - William James

# “The really religious person is accordingly unshakeable and full of equanimity, and calmly ready for any duty that the day may bring forth.” - William James

=== PART SIX: HOW TO KEEP FROM WORRYING ABOUT CRITICISM ===

# “Prayer fulfils these 3 very basic psychological needs which all people share, whether they believe in God or not: 1. Prayer helps us to put into words exactly what is troubling us … 2. Prayer gives us a sense of sharing our burdens, not being alone. … 3. Prayer puts into force an active principle of doing. … “ - DC

=== Chapter 20: Remember that no one ever kicks a Dead Dog ===

# “Vulgar people take huge delight in the faults and follies of great man.” - Schopenhauer

# “Why was General U.S. Grant arrested at the flood tide of his victory? Largely because he had aroused the jealousy and envy of his arrogant superiors.” - DC

# “Remember that unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment.” - DC

=== Chapter 21: Do this, and Criticism cant hurt you ===

# “I realize now that people are not thinking about you and me or caring what is said about us. They are thinking about themselves - before breakfast, after breakfast, and right on until 10 minutes past midnight.” - DC

# “Let me clear about this: I am not advocating ignoring all criticism. Far from it. I am talking about ignoring only unjust criticism.” - DC

# “If you get your head above the crowd, you’re going to be criticized.” - Mathew C. Brush

# “I do the very best I know how - the very best I cam; and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.” - Abraham Lincoln

=== Chapter 22: Fool Things I have Done ===

# “No one but myself can be blamed for my fall. I have been my own greatest enemy - the cause of my own disastrous fate.” - Napoleon Bonaparte

# “Every man is a damn fool for at least five minutes every day. Wisdom consists in not exceeding that limit.” - Elbert Hubbard

# “But here is another idea: when your anger is rising because you feel you have been unjustly condemned, why not stop and say: “Just a minute…” “ - DC

# “lets do what E.H. Little did: Let’s ask for unbiased, helpful, constructive criticism.” - DC

=== PART SEVEN: SIX WAYS TO PREVENT FATIGUE AND WORRY, AND TO KEEP YOUR ENERGY AND SPIRITS HIGH ===

# “Six ways to prevent fatigue and worry and keep your energy and spirits high: Rule 1: rest before you get tired. Rule 2: learn to relax at your work. Rule 3: protect your health and appearance by relaxing at home. Rule 4: Apply these four goof working habits … Rule 5: … put enthusiasm into your work. Rule 6: Remember, no one was ever killer by lack of sleep. … “ - DC

=== Chapter 23: How to add One Hour a Day to your Waking Life ===

# “That is simple: because fatigue often produces worry, or, at least, it makes you susceptible to worry.” - DC

# “So, to prevent fatigue and worry, the first rule is: Rest often. Rest before you get tired.” - DC

# “He didn't cure fatigue. He didn't have to cure it. He prevented it. Because he rester frequently, he was able to work on, fresh and fit, until long past midnight.” - DC

# “Rest is not a matter of doing absolutely nothing. Rest is repair.” - Daniel W. Josselyn

# “An hour’s nap before the evening meal plus six hour’s sleep at night - a total of seven hours - will do you more good than eight hours of unbroken sleep.” - DC

=== Chapter 24: What makes you Tired and What you can do About it ===

# “the greater part of the fatigue from which we suffer is of mental origin; in fact exhaustion of purely physical origin is rare.” - J. A. Hadfield

# “Worry, tenseness and emotional upsets are three of the biggest cause of fatigue.” - Metropolitan Life Insurance Company

=== Chapter 25: How the Housewife can avoid Fatigue and Keep Looking Young ===

# “ Talking your troubles over with someone you trust. We call it catharsis. … We all have to share our troubles. We have to share worry. We have to feel there is someone in the world who is willing to listen and able to understand.” - Dr. Rose Hilderding

# “Had the problem been solved? No, it wasn't that easy. What caused the change was talking to someone, getting a little advice and a little human sympathy.” - DC

=== Chapter 26: Four Good Working Habits that will help Prevent Fatigue and Worry ===

# “Good working habit No. 1: Clear your Desk of all papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand.” - DC

# “Men do not die from overwork. They die from dissipation and worry.” - Charles Evans Hughes

# “Good working habit No.2: Do things in their order of importance.” - DC

# “Good working habit No.3: When you face a problem, Solve it Then and There if you have the facts Necessary to make a decision. Don't keep putting off decisions.” - DC

# “Good working habit No.4: Learn to Organize, Deputize and Supervise.” - DC

=== Chapter 27: How to Banish the Boredom that produces Fatigue, Worry and Resentment ===

# “One of the chief causes of fatigue is boredom.” - DC

# “We rarely get tired when we are doing something interesting and exciting.” - DC

# “The lesson to be learned? Just this: our fatigue is often not caused by work, but by worry, frustration and resentment.” - DC

# “Where your interests are, there is your energy also. Walking ten blocks with a nagging wife can be more fatiguing than walking ten miles with an adoring sweetheart.” - DC

# “Our life is what our thoughts make it.” - Marcus Aurelius

=== Chapter 28: How to keep from Worrying about Insomnia ===

# The first requisite for a good night’s sleep is a feeling of security.” - DC

# “If we get tired enough, nature will force us to sleep even while we are walking.” - DC

=== PART EIGHT: HOW TO FIND THE KIND OF WORK IN WHICH YOU MAY BE HAPPY AND SUCCESFUL ===

=== Chapter 29: The Major Decisions of your Life ===

# “A man can succeed at almost anything for which he has unlimited enthusiasm.” - Charles Schwab

# “Beware of trying to elbow your way into such overcrowded fields as law, journalism, radio, motion pictures, and the “glamour occupations”. “ - DC

# “Take the time to get the facts before you act. If you don’t, you may spend half a lifetime regretting it.” - DC

=== PART NINE: HOW TO LESSEN YOUR FINANCIAL WORRIES ===

=== Chapter 30: ‘Seventy per cent of All of our worries …. ‘ ===

# “People who lives on budgets are happier people.” - Mrs. Stapleton

# “If you have what seems to you insufficient, then you will be miserable even if you possess the world.” - Seneca

# “To lessen financial worries, let’s try to follow these eleven rules: 1. Get the facts down on paper. 2. Get a tailor-made budget that really fits your needs! 3. Learn how to spend wisely. 4. Don't increase your headaches with your income. 5. Try to build credit, in the event you must borrow. 6. Protect yourself against illness, fire, and emergency expenses. 7. Do not have your life insurance proceeds paid to your widow in cash. 8. Teach your children a responsible attitude towards money. 9. If necessary, make a little extra off your children stove. 10. Don't gamble - ever. 11. If we cant possibly improve our financial situation, lets be good to ourselves and stop resenting what can’t be changed.” - DC

=== PART TEN: “HOW I CONQUERED WORRY” 32 TRUE STORIES ===

# “Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” - C. I. Blackwood

# “After reading history for an hour, I realize that bad as conditions are now, they are infinitely better than they used to be.” - Roger W. Babson

# “Son, you ought to get an education, you ought to make your living with your mind because your body will always be a handicap.” - Mother of Elmer Thomas

# “They believe that every word Mohammed wrote in the Koran is the divine revelation of Allah. So when the Koran says: God created you and all your actions,” they accept it literally. That is why they take life so calmly and never hurry or get into unnecessary tempers when things go wrong.” - R. V. C. Bodley

# “Sometimes when I have too many things to do all at once, I sit down and relax and smoke my pipe for an hour and do nothing.” - Wilbur Cross

# “I stood yesterday. I can stand today. And I will not permit myself to think about what might happen tomorrow.” - Dorothy Dix

# “God will take care of you.” - J. C. Penney

# “Worry goes when exercise begins.” - Colonel Eddie Eagan

# “Jim Birdsall learned to stop worrying because he analyzed his troubles.” - Jim Birdsall

# “It is good to know that we have hit bottom and survived. That makes all our daily problems seem easy by comparison.” - Ted Ericksen

# “I’ve hit bottom and I’ve stood it. There is no place to go now but up.” - Homer Croy

# “What a fool you are to be worrying about something that hasn't happened and may never happen. Life is short. I have only a few years to live, so I must enjoy life.” - Jack Dempsey

# Now, listen, as long as you can walk and feed yourself and are free from intense pain, you ought to be the happiest person in the world.” - Kathleen Halter

# “The reason my wife doesn't mind washing the dishes is because she washes only one dish at a time. I saw what my trouble was. I was trying to wash today’s dishes, yesterday’s dishes and dishes that weren't even dirty yet.” - William Wood

# “Times solves a lot of things. Time may also solve what you are worrying about today.” - Loius T. Montant

# “If a situation seemed insurmountable, face it! Start Fighting! Don’t give in!” - Mrs John Burger

==- END OF BOOK ===